Taming the Grawlix

Posted on by Scott

girl-2584728_640Odds are, you’ve never heard of a grawlix; but I bet you’ve seen one. They’re mysterious yet extremely common. They’re hard to describe, even though they are instantly recognizable. You could have one in your home or office right now.

This is a grawlix: #@$%*!

In 1964, Mort Walker coined this term to describe the series of symbols cartoonists use to represent profanity. Expressed in speech and thought balloons, the grawlix helps readers understand the pain, anger, or frustration felt by their favorite characters in the Sunday morning comics. When a fictional individual has a hard time expressing the negative emotions welling up inside, the grawlix is there to fill in the gaps.

Unfortunately, real life doesn’t come with a grawlix. When we feel strong negative emotions coming on, it’s no laughing matter. And while a bit of profanity might make you feel better in the moment, it does nothing to address the underlying cause. To move forward, you need to dig a little deeper.

Start by naming the emotion. Are you feeling angry? Are you frustrated? Does sad or guilty best describe your mood? Perhaps you are anxious, nervous, or just unsettled. Putting a label to your specific emotion helps put you back in control, allowing you to devise a plan for addressing it.

Next, zero in on the source. Identify the root cause – the action or inaction that led you to feel this way. Was it something you did? Are you feeling let down by others, or could it be a combination of the two? Write down the steps you believe it took to arrive at this point.

Now, cross out any steps that you can’t control. You see, often our anger, frustration, or anxiety comes as result of another person’s behavior. We expect them to act a certain way, and when they don’t our emotions take a turn for the worse. We enter a spiral of negativity, focusing on who wronged us, or disappointed us, rather than taking responsibility for our own future.

The secret to taming the grawlix is to act. Focus on the one person’s behavior that you can control – your own. Refuse to let your mind dwell on what could have been. Forget what others should have done. Create a plan of action for yourself. And execute it.

When you take responsibility for your destiny and take concrete steps to pursue the future you want, you’ll find little use for the grawlix. Unlike a Sunday morning cartoon, you won’t need a series of random symbols to express how you feel. My guess is you’ll have better things to say.

Of Forests and Trees

Posted on by Scott

nature-3294681_640I saw a commercial for Disney World the other day, and it brought to mind memories of a family trip we took there many years ago. I’ve always loved Disney World. Growing up, I lived close enough that our family went several times. As an adult, I was just as excited to take my own kids to this Magic Kingdom.

As we were walking between attractions, my eyes drifted from one scene to another. I marveled at the architectural details incorporated into the park. I wondered about the conversations I witnessed taking place all around me in numerous different languages. I smiled as I watched my children’s excitement constantly overwhelm them.

And then my eyes caught something different.

There on the ground just in front of me was a twenty dollar bill. People were stepping over it and on it as they walked. It was impossible to know who had dropped it. I picked it up and announced my find to the rest of the family. I remember making some remark about the magic of Disney and we walked on.

But then it happened again. This time, my eye spotted a folded up bit of cash. I went to throw away my empty drink cup and there it was, on the ground right next to the trash can. Close to $50 was added to my wallet this time.

In that moment, my kids were transformed. No longer were they interested in the rides, gift shops, or costumed characters. They weren’t even in interested in watching where they were going. All eyes were trained downward; searching for potential money on the ground. They ran into people. They scrambled to examine every bit of paper they saw. And because they were looking so hard, they couldn’t possibly see what they were looking for.

So many people walk through life with a narrow field of view. They are so focused on looking for one specific thing that they become blind to the possibilities around them. I didn’t find money that day because I was looking for it. I found it because my eyes were simply open. I was drinking in everything around me, enjoying the variety of scenery and activity in the moment. Because I wasn’t intent on finding any specific thing, I was open to seeing them all.

You’ve no doubt heard the phrase “Can’t see the forest for the trees.” This is often used to describe someone who is good at detail work, but tends to miss the bigger picture. They are too focused to understand what the team is trying to accomplish or how a particular task fits into the master plan. Their eyes aren’t open to possibilities that might lie right in front of them.

Our challenge as sales people, as customer service agents, and as leaders is to operate with eyes wide open. As we move through the day, we need to allow our senses to drink in what’s going on around us so that we can act on those opportunities others tend to miss. Subtle cues and clues can lead to sales. Unspoken needs can provide windows to serve. Casual interactions can open the door to meaningful mentoring.

Yes, we have tasks to perform. Yes, we have priorities that have been laid out. But we can’t be so singularly focused that we fail to pick up on fleeting chances to do something significant. The more we allow ourselves to enjoy the moment, the more able we are to see the magic.

After a while, my kids stopped looking for money on the ground and the joy returned to our vacation experience. That afternoon, we stopped and sat on a bench in order to review the park map and determine our next activity. Suddenly one of the kids jumped up and ran to the opposite side of the walkway. Something had caught his eye. He returned with a big grin on his face and a shiny quarter in his hand. “I wasn’t looking for it,” he said. “I was just looking around and there it was.”

Tinted Windows

Posted on by Scott

car-2797169_640Tuesday morning I found myself at a red light, positioned behind an ambulance. The window of the rear door was tinted; but sunlight streaming through a side window lit up the interior, rendering the tint ineffective. For the duration of the traffic signal’s cycle, I had a front-row seat to the drama unfolding inside.

A lady sat in the back of the ambulance, facing me. She was dressed in civilian clothes and talking to someone else (a first responder I presume) positioned with his back to me. She was sobbing, dabbing her eyes with a tissue.

Obviously, I couldn’t hear the conversation. But the setting and visual clues made it clear that she was in distress and the EMT was consoling her. Lights and siren hadn’t been turned on, so it would seem this wasn’t a life or death situation. I don’t even know that she was a patient – she was sitting upright, after all, and didn’t seem to be receiving direct medical care. Nevertheless, something significant had taken place and she was struggling with the result.

Every day, people move into our lives – sometimes for just a few moments. Every single one of them carries the weight of unseen burdens. It’s as if we see them through tinted windows. We might get a peek, but rarely do we grasp the totality of what they are wrestling with. We can’t possibly understand the circumstances that cause people to be where they are at any given moment. We can’t grasp the reasons for the decisions they make. It’s hard to actually see them at all really.

But occasionally, if we stand still, and the light is just right, we catch a glimpse. It’s in these moments when we see people for what they are – not account numbers or transactions to be completed, but as fellow human beings. It’s in these moments that we can truly be of service to them. It’s in these moments that we can make a real difference.

A welcoming smile. A kind word. An offer of assistance that reaches beyond the scope of our job description. These are the actions that transcend the job and add meaning to the moment.

We live in a world of connected loneliness. Never have we enjoyed the ability to share experiences and information with so many people so easily. Yet, never have we been so isolated. Hidden behind screens and avatars and user names are people – people yearning for connection.

The real business challenge we face is connecting. The easier we make it to get things done, through automation and self-help, the harder it becomes to bridge the gaps between us. And the more important it becomes to build those bridges.

Granted, it is safer to remain distant. My own life is messy enough; why should I take on someone else’s baggage? Why should I risk getting involved when I don’t have to? What’s to be gained?

Let’s be the kind of organization that builds bridges. Let’s be the kind of people that value relationships over transactions. Let’s be the ones who really connect. Let’s take the risk.

My light eventually turned green. Traffic starting flowing again. Before the ambulance pulled away, I saw the faceless passenger reach out and squeeze the crying lady’s hand. Then, just as the shifting light once again hid her tear-stained face, I believe I saw her smile.

The Fountain of Youth

Posted on by Scott

youth-570881_640On this day in 1513, Juan Ponce de Leon, an explorer from Spain, “discovered” Florida. The peninsula that makes up our southeastern-most state had been sighted before, but Ponce de Leon was the first to make landfall, arriving near the present-day city of St. Augustine. He named the new land “La Florida” since his arrival occurred during the time of Pascua Florida – the Easter Feast.

Legend says that Ponce de Leon was searching for the Fountain of Youth, a fabled stream of water that restored health and vitality. Stories of this mysterious spring were recorded as far back as the 5th century BC, when the Greek historian Herodotus wrote about it. Myths about the Fountain of Youth have been part of various cultures across the globe.

While there may not be an actual Fountain of Youth, I think it’s safe to say that we’d all like to maintain as much energy and vitality as possible. And it isn’t necessarily age that saps you of your youth. I know teenagers who act as if they’ve given up on life and senior citizens who are more active and alert than I ever was.

Obviously, exercise and diet play huge roles in prolonging life and providing energy, but according to research, there are a handful of intangibles that are just as important. Youth isn’t simply a matter of the body; it involves the mind as well. Here are three characteristics of youthful people to take note of.

They play. Think about the amount of time you spend at work. Have you ever noticed how the time seems to pass more quickly when you enjoy what you’re doing? That’s because we lose ourselves in the work when it’s enjoyable. We aren’t as prone to distractions and don’t even think about looking at the clock when we’re mentally engaged in the task at hand.

Studies show that laughter and mental engagement are key contributors to growth. We learn faster, perform better, and contribute more when we enjoy the work we do. Just because it’s called work doesn’t mean it can’t be fun.

They pursue. One of the things that make stories like the Fountain of Youth exciting is the pursuit of it. Ponce de Leon and other explorers left the comfort of their homes behind in search of something new and exciting. They weren’t content with what already was – they desired to accomplish something new.

What are you trying to accomplish at work? Do you have a goal that drives you to explore new opportunities on a regular basis? Without something to pull you forward, there’s no excitement. Don’t wait for someone else to introduce a little adventure into your job. Be an explorer and seek out opportunities that no one else has before.

They bend. It’s no doubt that, as we age, our bodies become less flexible. The same goes for our minds – unless we take care to exercise them. I think the term “malleable” is most apt to use in this context. Substances that are malleable aren’t flexible by nature, they’ve been pressed or even hammered into shape without breaking.

The key for us to is to view change as a chance to become something different – to assume a new shape without allowing the process to break us. People who are too set in their ways have a difficult time flexing or morphing into something new. Yet, as youths we did it without even thinking about it. It’s in our nature to flex. We lose that tendency over time and start to remain fixed.

Often it seems the biggest life-suckers of all come from work. For many people, work is drudgery – a grind. They live for the five o’clock whistle and the weekend. But that’s no way to live. It’s a definite recipe for growing old. And there’s no reason why it has to be that way.

Seek to incorporate some play into your profession. Pursue a goal that’s bigger than yourself. Try to roll with the changes that come your way, maybe even initiate a few yourself. Odds are, the Fountain of Youth is closer than you think.

I Am a Top Performer!

Posted on by Scott

boy-3213773_640I am dependable.
I can be counted on to do what I say I will do when I say I will do it. I don’t make promises I can’t or don’t intend to keep.

I am positive.
I look for opportunities, not problems. I think in terms of what we can do vs. what can’t be done. I view the glass as half-full.

I am relatable.
I treat customers and coworkers with kindness and respect. I smile, greet others and take an interest in them.

I am proactive.
I don’t wait to be told what to do. I know what needs to be done to move the team forward and I do it.

I am flexible.
I accept new responsibilities and changes to existing ones. I can adjust my schedule to accommodate unexpected events.

I am coachable.
I accept criticism and instruction well. I invite feedback that helps me shore up my weaknesses and improve on my strengths.

I am creative.
I look for ways to improve my job and organization. I know that “because we’ve always done it that way” is a poor excuse.

I am a communicator.
I share information freely. I take care to express myself well, both verbally and in writing, and listen to what others have to say.

I am a problem-solver.
I look for ways to say “yes” and to move forward. Obstacles are problems to be solved, not excuses to give up.

I am growing.
I seek out ways to improve myself so that I constantly add value to the team. I enjoy learning new things and gaining new skills.

I am a top performer!

Huh?

Posted on by Scott

cotton-swabs-495745_640On a busy street corner in Mumbai, India, Sayed Mehboob sits on a small wooden stool. He leans in close to his first customer of the day and inserts a metal pick into the man’s aural canal. Sayed is a professional kaan saaf wallah. He’s an ear-cleaner.

A little over 2,000 miles away in Chengdu, China, Peng Dajun arranges his ear-cleaning tools on a small table in the park where he plies his trade. Mr. Peng learned the practice from his father and is sharing what he knows to his nephew. He feels it’s important to pass along the tradition as part of his country’s cultural heritage.

Meanwhile, Mii-Chan arrives for her shift at one of Japan’s ear-cleaning parlors. For about $30, her clients enjoy tea and conversation as part of their private session. Hers is only one of over 1000 businesses offering the service.

While you may cringe at the idea of having someone else poking around inside your ears, you’ve likely found yourself wondering if a colleague could use a good swab. Adequate listening skills often seem to be in short supply. At one time or another, our coworkers, employees, and managers all seem to suffer from some kind of blockage – something that prevents them from hearing what it is you have to say.

It’s important to note that hearing and listening and very different activities. Hearing is a passive activity. It takes place when sound waves enter the ear and are converted into electrical impulses by the brain. It happens without thinking. You can’t help it. At any given moment, hundreds of different sounds assault your ears. Without even trying, you hear them.

Listening though, is not passive. In fact, it’s the opposite of hearing. You have to put in some effort in order to listen. If you’re not careful, any number of things can block your ability to listen effectively.

Your predispositions.
Your preferences.
Your prejudices.
Your priorities.
Your pride.

Yes, for listening to take place you must work at it. And you don’t need the help of a professional ear-cleaner, either. There are some very simple steps you can take.

  1. Prepare to listen. Put yourself in the right state of mind. Remove distractions and avoid multitasking. Adopt open body language and direct your full attention to the other person and what they are saying.
  2. Work at listening. Watch the other person to see how their body language enhances, or contradicts, their message. Keep yourself from interrupting. When it is your turn to talk, ask questions to clarify your own understanding.
  3. Listen with empathy. Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Ask open questions that encourage them to fully express themselves. Be comfortable with silence as they search for the right words.

When you practice effective listening skills, you get more information, and you are better prepared to contribute to the conversation. That’s because really listening involves hearing the whole message. And remember that no matter how intently you try to listen, sometimes the message just doesn’t get through. That’s why effective listening requires constant practice.

Or you could always pay a visit to Mr. Peng.

He Ain’t Heavy

Posted on by Scott

Kevan Chandler lives with spinal muscular atrophy. It’s a genetic disease that attacks the motor nerve cells, slowly robbing you of the ability to move. Your strength begins to fade as muscles waste away. SMA is the number one genetic cause of death for infants, claiming most lives by the age of 18 months. Making it to adulthood was only one of Kevan’s many challenges.

The condition has forced Kevan to spend his life in a wheelchair. That means he’s typically unable to join his friends on many of their adventures. The guys Kevan is closet to enjoy “urban exploring;” the practice of climbing through tunnels and old, abandoned buildings. As you can imagine, this type of activity isn’t exactly ideal for someone with extremely limited mobility.

So when the gang devised a plan for a new adventure, a backpacking trip across Europe, you can imagine how Kevan must have felt. But the group declared that they wanted everyone to participate – everyone including Kevan. They couldn’t imagine leaving him behind. The challenge became how to overcome the limitations posed by SMA in order to experience the trip as a team.

Over the course of several months, a special backpack was designed – one that would allow Kevan’s able-bodied friends to carry his 65 pound frame through France, Ireland, and the other countries on their itinerary. Four of the men took turns carrying Kevan, while another three managed handled the gear and recorded a trip that has evolved into a mission.

Upon their return, the group founded a special organization called “We Carry Kevan.” This nonprofit seeks to rethink the idea of accessibility. Their goal is to pursue new ways of equipping not just those with disabilities, but their support systems as well. They realized that the backpack they designed for their friend represented a doorway to inclusion and teamwork never seen before.

What strikes me about this story is the mindset of those involved. And I think there a few lessons for those of us operating as part of any team.

1. The team is better when everyone participates. Like many of us, this group dreamed of overseas travel. But for these guys, the trip simply wasn’t worth taking unless everyone could go. They didn’t want to leave anyone behind. From the get-go, the idea was to travel together. How many of us look at our journey as an individual effort? We may call those around us a team, but do we really desire to be part of the group? Does our default vision of success involve others?

2. They felt a responsibility to carry Kevan. Teams that work together are teams that succeed together. Kevan’s friends didn’t simply dangle the prospect of a trip in front of him and suggest he find a way to join them. They invested themselves in his success. When you see the other members of your team as vital parts of your circle, you start to see their challenges as yours. The team succeeded by figuring out a way for one individual to move forward. Without everyone’s participation, it’s unlikely the effort would have ended in a positive result.

3. Kevan was worth carrying. I can’t imagine the physical challenges Kevan Chandler faces every day. I do know that small setbacks often cause my attitude to turn sour. When your outlook is negative, no one wants to be around you, much less help you. When your first instinct is to complain, people will move away from you, not toward you. Kevan is obviously someone people want to associate with. His friends want him in their lives, so they instinctively stepped up to help.

I love finding out about stories like this. I love being inspired. Naturally, I’m now thinking about the people in my circle that might need a hand. I’m wondering what I can do to help. And I’m wondering if the members my team are ready to carry me should the opportunity arise.

The Secrets to Success

Posted on by Scott

tent-384108_640Back in October, Nickolas Green began uploading videos to YouTube. The 15-year-old outdoor enthusiast filmed himself hunting, trapping, and practicing all manner of outdoor skills. By January 1st, his channel had reached a grand total of 70 subscribers.

To celebrate, and as a show of gratitude, Nickolas made a new video. He spent the night camping in his backyard. With temperatures hovering around -20 Fahrenheit, he narrated his experience for the camera. He reviewed his gear, described the environment, and shared his thoughts on the physical discomfort and the slow passage of time. He did all of this with the wide-eyed enthusiasm of youth. In other words, he was real.

And then last week, Nickolas suddenly gained traction. His video was shared on Reddit and went viral. It was viewed 95,000 times overnight. Viewers were drawn not to his fancy camera work or polished acting skills, but to his honesty. Today, his subscriber count has shot from 70 to almost over 70,000. Nickolas Green is a YouTube sensation.

They say that nice guys finish last; that to get ahead, you must be ruthless, political, and often even deceitful. The more you see others rewarded for this kind of behavior, the harder it is to justify remaining true to yourself. But people like Nickolas Green remind us that there’s another route to success; one that I find much more refreshing.

Be honest.

Be genuine.

Be engaged.

Be humble.

Be grateful.

Admit it; these are the qualities we appreciate in others, especially those we do business with. Lose my trust and you’re likely to lose your share of my wallet. Businesses who operate in the open and display admirable qualities may not skyrocket to the top overnight, but they also don’t have to worry about the public discovering any skeletons in the closet down the road.

The same goes for the individuals who occupy every level of the company. Real leaders, regardless of the actual title they wear, aren’t interested in playing political games. They don’t have to worry about who they’ve told which lies to or which version of the story is the “official” one. When you approach work from the right heart-set, you’ll have the right mind-set.

Perhaps it’s just my age showing, but I’d much rather watch Nickolas Green than most of his professionally accomplished contemporaries. And perhaps in time he will become jaded as well. I hope not. I hope he remembers how simply being himself led to his success.

Tuned In

Posted on by Scott

bear-3145874_640Thirty-five years ago this week, one of my favorite television shows aired its final episode. It was called M.A.S.H. and centered on the men and women who served at the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital during the Korean War. The show ran for 11 seasons, with the first episode airing on September 17, 1072 and the finale on February 28, 1983. It won numerous awards and is one of the highest-rated shows in television history. That final episode became the most-watched and highest-rated single television episode in history at the time.

What made M.A.S.H. unique was its ability to balance humor and drama. The antics of the ensemble cast were funny and entertaining to watch, but the seriousness of war was never lost. The show had a soul to it. Watching it, you felt like these were real people experiencing real emotions. Their interactions, both the lighthearted and the intense, allowed you to feel what they felt in the moment.

Many of the stories evolved from the encounters of actual surgeons and nurses involved in the Korean conflict. Characters in the show resembled actual people who had been a part of these stories. As a result, the actors became invested in accurately conveying the ups and downs of life in this small community of people who had been thrust together by fate.

I fear that sometimes we forget that we’re involved in the stories of real people too. We go through the motions – just dialing it in – or focus on our own selfish goals for the day. We lose sight of the fact that the interactions we have with customers, coworkers, and others have very real implications.

Each time we assist a customer, it’s an opportunity to positively impact their life. It might be in a profound way, through a sale or solving a problem; but often it’s in small ways – sharing a smile or a kind word. We have the same opportunity when it comes to our daily interactions with other team members. The way we approach these touch points can have significant ripple effects on their lives, and our own.

I hope you view your work as more than just a job. What a lonely, sad existence that is – to spend your days waiting for them to end. Work should be rewarding; not just financially, but socially, emotionally, and psychologically as well. We should all seek to contribute to something larger than just the immediate menial task. We should all actively contribute to the stories of others.

That’s what I loved about M.A.S.H. It was obvious that the actors and writers of this simple sitcom didn’t just see their work as a means to the next paycheck. They were devoted to the process, their individual characters, and to each other. And because they were devoted, the viewers were too.

I recently read a series of interviews where those involved in the show reflected on what M.A.S.H. had meant to them. Even 35 years after the ended, the impact of this shared experience was profound. Everyone had been touched.

Loretta Switt, who played Major Margaret “Hot Lips” Houlihan, recalled the cast’s last time together. It was the night the finale aired, and the group decided to go out for a farewell dinner. She noted that the streets were unusually empty. Later, they found out his was because so many people were inside, watching M.A.S.H. No one, it seemed, wanted to miss out on the story.

Driving to Mars

Posted on by Scott

rocket-630461_640Last week the Space X rocket Falcon Heavy lifted off from Kennedy Space Center. The launch was the latest in a series of experiments designed to usher in a new era of space flight. The ultimate goal is to privatize space travel, for both commercial and personal use.

News reports of the launch focused on the Falcon Heavy’s payload, an empty space suit posed behind the wheel of a Tesla convertible. The vehicle was placed into an orbit mimicking that of Mars and is expected to circle the sun forever; unless outside forces nudge it into deep space. I find the idea of a convertible flying through space blasting David Bowie absolutely incredible.

Many don;t agree with this assessment. There are those who feel like it mocks the significance of space flight. Some say we’re just launching junk into space instead of focusing on important issues here on Earth. Others feel it’s just a waste of money.

But despite the comical notion of driving in space, I feel this accomplishment has a lot to tell us about the concept of goal achievement. If we look behind the headlines, there are some important lessons to be learned from what Space X has done.

  • Their mission is to push the envelope. The goal of this launch wasn’t really to put a car into space. It was to advance the capabilities of space flight. The Falcon Heavy was designed with reusable rockets. In fact, both of the boosters used were from past launches of smaller Falcon 9 craft. Designing something reusable, as opposed to NASA’s single-use boosters, cuts down tremendously on the cost of putting something into space. Having already proven that a rocket booster could be retrieved, this mission served to prove that they could be used on even larger, payload capable rockets and recovered yet again.
  • Their focus is on steadily moving forward. The Falcon Heavy was originally supposed to launch in 2013, but getting to this point turned out to be much harder than anticipated. But the engineers didn’t give up. They focused on solving one problem after the next until enough issues had been resolved for them to hit the ignition button. Designing a new type of rocket meant looking at things from different angles and breaking new ground in a series of related areas. The retractable landing legs of the boosters, for instance, required the largest casting of titanium in history. An accomplishment in and of itself, this was but one of the obstacles that had to be overcome in pursuit of the ultimate goal.
  • Their approach is lighthearted. Obviously, launching a multi-million dollar spacecraft is no laughing matter. However, serious work doesn’t have to preclude having a little fun. Take that Tesla put into orbit. In order to test the capability of past rockets to deliver a payload, a block of concrete was typically used. Pretty boring, huh? Space X decided to approach the same necessary test with a bit of style. Of course, a natural side effect of this approach is a positive boost to employee morale and their brand perception.

The best work always involves achieving goals, exploring new ideas, and doing so in a fun way. It’s my hope that we all look at our own jobs not as a mindless, empty experience; but as a journey full of promise and adventure. With the right attitude, any profession can be a trip worth taking.